Intelligence, Vocabulary, and Parenting

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that intelligence is something that one is born with and cannot be changed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that intelligence is a function of the words that one know and the meanings that one has for those words and the ability to use them automatically within speaking, writing, and reading and within assessing information, and that the more one's vocabulary reflects reality then the more effective (and thus intelligent) one will be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the way we teach children words is not systematic and effective and this leads to a dysfunctional world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself, as a parent or someone around children, to think is it funny and cute to misteach a child something to hear them say something that is not correct.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the extent to which we teach children incorrect information which leads to them being unreasonable, overly emotional and illogical, and open to manipulation through information and imagery.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that educating a child begins primarily with the parent/educator having an effective vocabulary, free of bias, and free of the patterns of emotional manipulation which would otherwise destroy the child's innocence and dumb them down, and that educating a child is really nothing more than supporting them to develop effective vocabulary, reading ability, and mathematics ability.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself, as a parent, to not realize that NO ONE in the system is qualified to educate a child, and yet that doesn't mean that what the parent does is automatically best - the parent must develop their skills in reading, mathematics and vocabulary to a point of excellence otherwise this will negatively impact the child's development.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that school classrooms are designed to teach to the average intelligence levels and thus they will not support excellence in vocabulary, reading, and math and thus the children who seem to excel in school are getting support outside of school from parents, tutors, and other sources.

I commit myself to show that parents can be trained to educate their children more effectively than what is occurring in the schools and that this can be accomplished only by using TechnoTutor as a tool that will support the parent to rebuild their vocabulary and to build the child's effectively.

Patterns of Frustration

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be disappointed, to feel disappointment, to feel sadness, and frustration when my child goes into an emotional pattern.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my child for going into an emotional pattern of, for example, frustration, to which I then react with frustration, showing that it is I who have taught the child the pattern in the first place, and thus I am the one who is responsible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for being frustrated that I have taught my child frustration.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize what frustration really is.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that physical frustration is the impeding of progress or completion of something, and thus in itself, is not an emotion, and yet I have accepted and allowed myself to react emotionally when something I am doing is impeded from moving forward or when I am stopped from continuing something or completing something I am focused on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel despondent about my child getting emotionally frustrated when they are impeded within something, not realizing that I am thus placing the responsibility to support them outside of myself, hence the despondence, and thus if I can understand my own frustration experience, then I can support my child to understand theirs.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is normal to FEEL frustrated when something doesn't go the way that I want it to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I feel frustrated when I don't understand why something is impeding me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I feel frustrated when I have created an internal energy towards something, and thus the feeling of being frustrated is really the experience of energy within myself towards something being impeded, and thus it is really the experience of either not having the energy continue within me or not getting the energy experience that I was expecting that is causing the FEELING of frustration.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a feeling of depression and/or anger in moments where I do not get something that I was expecting, and thus it is the expectation that is the issue, from the perspective of building up an energetic experience towards the point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that creating energetic expectations and participating in energy puts me at a disadvantage in a physical reality where I do not control all the variables, and never will, because I am in a reality of collective agreement, not one where I control everything, and thus I must come to terms with this, and realize that the key for me is to stop participating in energy within myself in my mind and rather be here physically looking at what is really going on and seeing what can be worked within in that context.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to control how my child plays with toys which is really just me wanting to create an energetic experience within myself and to transfer that to my child and within that create another layer of energy within reflecting on what I have created as a copy of me in my child.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the extend to which I am projecting my experience onto my child and creating conflict within that between my child and me.

I commit myself to develop the awareness that my child is a reflection of me and to in those moments where I feel frustrated towards my child to realize, to see, that the child is me, and to stop and to breathe, and to let go of the energy - to support me in that moment, firstly, and thus to prepare myself to be able to support my child as well to let go in those moments - realizing that I cannot demand that my child do something I am not willing to do.

Eschewing Emotional Manipulation of Children

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize as a parent that when I tell my child that I will leave them if they do not come with me that this will create a great consequence for the child in terms of imprinting them with fear which will diminish their ability to live effectively.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as a parent, when I tell my child that they have to come with me or I will leave them, or I walk away and say 'Bye, I'm leaving now' instead of clearly supporting them to understand that it is time to leave and that we will all be going and supporting them to make the decision to come with me without fear, that if I do that, I am only supporting the child to exist in fear, and I am deliberately using the fear of loss to emotionally manipulate them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that, as a parent, I can prevent a situation where my child will not come with me by communicating with them effectively from the beginning and supporting them to develop an effective vocabulary and ability to communicate, and that I must support myself with this as well, and by doing that I can create an agreement with my child of support where communication is used instead of force and emotional manipulation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I use force or emotional manipulation with my child, this in no way supports them to be able to make effective decisions, it in fact dumbs them down, because if I do not support them to understand reality and understand consequences through common sense and logic and instead imprint them with fear then they will live their life in fear and always trying to avoid the experience of negative emotion, which is not an intelligent way to live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, as a parent, the degree and extent of influence that I have, and that every word, every encounter, every experience counts and builds my child's understanding of the world and their understanding of themselves and directly affects their self-esteem.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the degree to which I affect my child's self-esteem.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to believe that my child is just learning everything on their own, so that I can feel like my child is special and therefore that I am special, when in fact I am the primary (along with my spouse) influence on my child and determine virtually everything about who they will become and how they will live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that if I take emotional manipulation and force off of the table, then I will have to become MORE CREATIVE and support myself to become BETTER in order to be able to communicate with my child from the beginning effectively.

I commit myself to show that the best way to parent, is to take force and emotional manipulation off the table as an option, and rather 'force' myself to develop effective communication, clear, direct, and explain as much as possible, and that through this, my child will develop a keen ability to understand and communicate and reason.

So Called Experts

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that experience gives someone authority.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that is created through one's starting point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that a teacher, for example, that has 30 years of experience teaching, would justify that they know more about education than someone who is not a teacher, and yet they may have never been able to support a child to reach their full potential, and this shows that experience itself is not the basis of authority.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that authority comes from establishing oneself as effective within what is best for all, which is only possible within common sense and self honesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want others to validate my authority within parenting and education.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that authorities and experts in the system really only want the system to continue because it provides them with the position of being an expert and an authority.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the only education that truly matters is the education of understanding the relationship between the mind and the physical and how to direct oneself in this physical reality within oneness and equality with the physical as Life, because any other education that does not do this will create consequences that are not best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel any fear whatsoever in the face of someone who claims experience as authority.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek validation instead of standing clearly within the solution to education.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold back in presenting the real solution to education, whether in a group, or with individuals.

I commit myself to show that the system's so called experts and authorities on education have no idea about how education actually works, because they don't understand how the mind works and how the child really learns even one single word.

I commit myself to show that the basis of the current educational paradigms are in accepting the child as already screwed up and do not know how to remediate the child's ability to access their natural learning ability and program in words effectively so that the child is unbiased and truly effective with processing information and making clear decisions based on common sense and self-honesty.

Remember Why We Are Here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be certain of why I am here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to entertain doubt as to why I am here and what I am here to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am here just to experience life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am currently within the context of what I have created and accepted and allowed to be created.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify not walking the Desteni process with fear and excuses of survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the excuses that my mind comes up with to not walk this process are not the actual reasons, the actual reason is that I have not made the decision to walk this process without looking back.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear supporting another person through their process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist supporting others within clarity and within the willingness to challenge them, because I have not been willing to do the same for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to challenge others because I want to hold on to limitations and excuses and desires within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am aware of this process due to another standing up and actively placing themselves at 'risk' so to speak in the context of the survival system so that I would have the opportunity to be exposed to this process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the ONLY PURPOSE of being here at the moment that is valid is to support the creation of an equal money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the purpose of walking my process is to remove that within myself which would prevent me from either standing up and supporting the implementation of or at the very least being able to give my full consent and being able to participate within an equal money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the Journey to Life is the way to equalize the process for everyone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give others the excuse to not walk their process in writing, so that I may give myself the same excuse.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that selling is nothing more than clear communication about the value that I see within something support another person from where they are at currently to see the value as I do - thus selling another person is a process in itself, and also a way for me to quantify my own process to show, measurably, how I have actually changed to be able face others, and support them through their own resistances to changing, just as I have supported myself and received support from others, and to thus not walk my process within an internal feelings-based assessment of whether I am changing, but to measure it based on the principle of 1 + 1 = 2 where I support another person to begin walking their process and support them to support others and then to continue and find another person to share within them the value of this process.

I commit myself to stand in the open and participate in selling others on why they should walk their process - because this is MY reality just as much as it is EVERYONE ELSE's and thus I must be clear on where I stand and what I stand for and although I realize that force is never the answer, I must be clear in communicating the value of walking this process so that everyone will eventually come to this point.

GAME OVER

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have separated myself from the physical existence and my physical body as who I am Here into a myriad of different characters in my mind in which I participate in order to survive as energy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have placed value on the existence and survival of an illusion in my mind as a character/characters as memories, thoughts, and feelings and placed little to no value on the physical reality and how it works and functions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a slave to designing and living out characters within my mind and through my interaction with others and this physical world throughout my existence/this life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that/define Life is/as the experience of energy and the living out of a character based on creating memories and reliving memories.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have defined Life/living as just playing a game.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see other people as a character and to value them only as characters and to the degree that they support the characters that I have created within me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create characters and suppress some while living out others, not realizing that the ones I suppress will also determine what I do and how I live as they run in the background and are fed with energy that I generate through participating in the characters that I 'accept' as myself.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that what I have created as characters are like Frankenstein's monster, that I have created them in an attempt to create 'Life' but not taking full responsibility for what I create and then experiencing the consequences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that in the experience of the consequences of living as characters in my mind here in reality, I have created even more characters as the reaction/response/feeling about the consequences that I experience which further compounds the consequences because I have not taken full responsibility for who I am and what I do and accept and allow and that this is the fundamental reason for the existence of a consequence that is not best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that even the idea that I am a powerful creator is another character, it is not real, in the sense that I am creating anything of value that is best, as a TRULY powerful creator would, but all I am 'creating' is characters, and thus I am equal to and one with that point of even my status as creator being just another character.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that Life is not a game and that the REAL character that is actually physically here as my physical body and all other physical beings and manifestations are completely being missed and not taken care of equally as what is best because I have instead focused on what characters in my mind would support the experience of my own self-defined self-interest as the pursuit of some optimum energy experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am equal to and one with what I accept and allow and thus if I accept and allow myself to create characters in my mind and give those my focus and attention then I am only a character in my mind and not real, and thus there now exists a GAME OVER point in my future.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that if I play games, then I will eventually face GAME OVER.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that this is my last life, that the game will no longer continue - that this is GAME OVER - and that this is my one opportunity to be self-honest, forgive myself, correct myself and do what is best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the consequence for treating Life as a game is that this is the Last Life in the game.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the only way to have Everlasting Life is to give up this Life as the Game and be Here and do what is Best for All.

I commit myself to - through writing, self-forgiveness, and self corrective application - investigate, deconstruct, and remove all the characters that I have created throughout time and get to know the REAL physical reality Here and align myself to always act in accordance with Reality as what is optimal as what is best for all.

I commit myself to show that all characters in the mind are only ever designed as a point of trying to generate energy which only fuels the further existence of the characters in the mind and creates real physical consequences in physical reality that are not best and thus create the conditions will eventually spell the end of all fake, mind characters.

I commit myself to show parents that they are teaching their children to create characters in their mind out of survival and thus trapping their children into an illusion that will seal their fate just as it has sealed the parents fate of NOT SURVIVING this reality beyond death.

Why Desteni?

What is there to fear?

All fear comes down to fear of loss, and the major point of loss that we all fear is the loss of our lives at death. But if we really look at it, it makes no sense to fear this point, because we are not really alive.

Consider: you wake up. You (if you're lucky) go to your job and do something that you would likely rather not do in order to make money so that you can buy food, clothing, shelter (all basic needs to continue existing) and then (if you are REALLY lucky) you will have extra money to entertain yourself through music, movies, alcohol or other drugs, vacations, and all other manner of experiences - mostly all of these serving as the reward for doing all of the other things you had to do to survive. Then, essentially, you repeat this process. Every day. Until you die.

While you are here you constantly, whether consciously or in the background of your thoughts and feelings, feel a terror about what happens when you die, and so you look for certainty around you in anything and anyone who can give you some sense of knowing what will happen.

Some people use religion for that purpose, some are anti-religious and convince themselves nothing happens and everything is meaningless except your individual experience of happiness, some believe you just turn into energy and transform, some say they don't know but within that feel a sense of pride about not knowing and this serves as a sense of purpose as being like someone who goes through life always on the fence, keeping your options open so to speak. In any case, no one really knows but all the existent approaches have something in common:

Everyone only cares about their own individual existence as they experience themselves. Even those who are compassionate and give their lives in service are doing it from the perspective of some reward either Here, in their direct experience as a form of bliss, peace, or in the Hereafter as a reward and union of God, but no matter what the person's intentions are the major problem is that it is all still done from the perspective of their own limited, individual perspective and thus whatever a person does that could be called 'good' never has any real lasting effect. No charity, selflessness, compassion, etc ever CAN have an real lasting effect because the fundamental starting point of who we are and how we exist is SELF INTEREST which is producing the consequences that the 'compassionate' is trying to help within. Even the 'compassionate' person is still fundamentally the same as everyone else, its just in the context of how we have defined good and bad they are more on the 'good' end but that in itself should tell us something. That trying to help others in need is seen as good which means that the opposite exists. So how does the person helping others solve the problem of 'bad' or 'evil' existing? They can't. Primarily because they themselves are in fact evil. That might seem like a strange statement, but you really must study the material in Heaven's Journey to Life Blog because it explains this statement quite clearly and supports the reader to see this for themselves.

So coming back to the point of fearing death as fearing to lose one's life, we are all existing in a world where life does not exist. No one has any actual choices because what we do is primarily dictated by how much money we have and how much money we have is determined primarily due to the environment we were conceived and brought up in for the first 7 years of our life. Our parents were living out patterns of survival and so that is what we copied and this Fear of Death is the most primary survival pattern. It is so prominent that we never question the validity of the system that runs this would. One, because we don't have 'time' to, and two, because even if we did, what could we do about it? But then this just shows our true starting point of existing, being more concerned about 'surviving' than Living. More worried about existing for one more day than with what is True and Real.

So we create a story in our heads about our lives, in the form of memories, where we are always the central character and we are always right in some way or the victim or the victor in some way, and within this we entertain ourselves for our entire lifetime even though none of it is real and it only has meaning in the context of our individual experience while we are in this body and even then the individual pieces that make up our memories are all just things that are GIVEN to us through the system that exists. No one is actually creating themselves from scratch as what they would TRULY like, they are just accepting things as is, and depending on their understanding of the system and ability to make money will create a really cool experience or basically be in constant survival mode. But even those we call the elite have the same basic fears as everyone else and thus they have to create or accept systems of control that ensure that the vast majority would never be able to have a life like they do because they fear having their lives diminish. And we can't blame that on the elite because everyone is living from the same starting point whether they realize it or not.

The question is what can be done?

The reality is that the 'elite' as the super rich generally are not going to care about this because their lives are pretty cool by comparison to everyone else. They are focused on keeping what they have an keeping everyone else down. The super poor are too busy just trying to get the basics for survival and are so uneducated that they will likely never be able to have ANY impact whatsoever. That leaves the Middle.

The Middle is the ones that must change first. It is the middle that believe there is a middle. They allow the super rich to exist because the middle knows that they are in the middle due to the super rich allowing them to be there (for the time being) and that if the system were to be challenged it may create insecurity in the middle.

The Middle fears being at the bottom and even though they will never be at the top, they will rather stay put and allow the top to exist so long as they don't end up at the bottom. They have their basic needs met, but still have to place all their focus on working so that they can have a little bit of the feel good stuff, but not too much, so it always leaves them wanting more, and yet what they are doing to get it, due to education, will never challenge the super rich, and in any case they are the ones in service of the super rich as the doctors, lawyers, accountants, engineers, architects, etc who keep the system running and are basically the slave managers (of the slaves, the lower class) for the slave masters (the super rich). The problem with a system based on slaves is that we are all equal to and one with what we accept and allow, thus we are ALL (even the rich) slaves to: MONEY.

Thus the KEY to changing this world is changing our agreements, collectively, about how money functions and what the value is that is placed on it. It is more about what we place as valuable rather than 'redistribution' because even the concept of redistribution is based on some idea that money is limited when it is not. It is imaginary and only because its value has been defined as profit which is representative of individual self-interest does it not serve the interests of all. It is all in the definitions which are the collective agreements.

So the reason the middle class is the key, and must wake up, and change what they individually place value on is that it is the middle class that is the ones voting, and has the time to consider what they vote for and are the ones that buy the most stuff and thus are voting with their dollars as well. The middle class has to begin to REALLY CARE about the world but also themselves, because the number one driving force of all decisions and 'choices' are coming from the fear of loss as fear of death, and this is a problem that can actually be SOLVED as is explained in the Desteni material.

So if you have the time to read this, then you have a responsibility to apply yourself, change, and stand up in the system. It is not possible without being a part of a group, which Desteni is the only group standing up and speaking the truth about reality and about what we are accepting and allowing as individuals and how to change it.

So, if you can identify with what I'm writing here, I suggest that you start reading Creation's Journey to Life and Heaven's Journey to Life from Day 1, both blogs, one day at a time. I suggest to start watching Bernard Poolman's videos on youtube. I suggest to check out the Desteni website. Listen to the interviews on Eqafe. Connect with other Desteni members online. Start investigating what is going on within yourself and ask yourself why you fear dying. And find out how you can start Living.

Application through Time vs Instant Gratification

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a victim to the feelings produced by my body that I have in fact programmed in to be generated automatically to direct me into a state of pursuing self-interest in order generate positive energy as experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a slave to thinking.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have chained myself to the experience of negative feelings as a motivator and stimulus to seek out positive energy through experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the extent to which I have formed relationships in my world in order to automatically, within the context of the relationship, create a positive energy experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire instant gratification.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want GRATIFICATION which is the fulfillment of self-interest as energy experience, which is a form of TAKING, when stopping self-interest and only GIVING what is best for all would eventually result in the RECEIVING of GRATITUDE which would be the receiving of what is best for me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sit and THINK about all the ways in which I can achieve a grandiose, magnificent result, which within the thinking itself I experience the energy and exhilaration of the achievement of the result, which is like another form of orgasm that one would experience as the buildup within a relationship within sex, and yet if the discipline to produce the result is not there, then the result one imagined and THOUGHT about never materializes, and thus this thinking is in fact like a form of mental masturbation where I ALONE WIN and yet I also immediately am placed in the position of the loser because I was only generating energy for the mind to continue existing and not in any way producing a result that is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not develop the self-discipline through application, moment by moment, and support myself within self-mastery to in each moment direct myself according to the logic of what is best for all within common sense as to whether or not my actions within moment would accumulate to the result that is best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the relationships that I have formed through my mind within/towards my physical body and the physical reality were formed through time, through decisions made in time, reinforced through time, and acted upon in/through time and thus the solution to stopping and reversing these relationships is not something that will happen immediately, as it must be walked through/in time, and that this would constitute the 'proof' of who I am as no longer willing to accept and allow myself to create and engage in relationships that are not best for all.

Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that it is not enough to 'stop participating' in these relationships but to actively deconstruct them through writing, self-forgiveness, and corrective application as is being walked in this blog.

I commit myself to walk this process, step by step, moment by moment, day by day, in each breath, disengaging in the pursuit of energy, while also daily deconstructing through investigation and self-forgiveness the relationships that are causing the energy pursuit or the consequence of energy experience which happens in a moment to continue coming up.

I commit myself to show that are best for all are not going to be instantaneous while most people/the system/myself have not completely stopped all relationships that are not best and reformed each point of interaction between all parts of reality to only support that which is best for all, and thus only at that point would one expect/know that a result that is best would be instantaneous because it would be the manifestation of the entire collective agreement/movement as what is best for all, and thus until that point is reached, I realize that I am still facing consequences that must walked through and not participated in while stopping the automation of these consequences and thus supporting myself and each one in this reality as one as equal to do the same as a point of self-responsibility, and that this is the only way, and yet the certain way, that reality will eventually be directed to produce always what is best for all at all times and in all ways.

Child Support as Life Support

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that everything I see in my child/children is a reflection of me, because they are copying the patterns that exist within me, from thinking, emotions, feelings, sounds, behaviors, everything that is within me is being downloaded into the child from the moment of conception in a way that is not visible to the eye but the effects can be seen in self-honesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as a parent, what I like in my child is what I either like in myself, or would have liked to see in myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as a parent, what I dislike in my child is what I dislike within myself or what I have suppressed/rejected within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in thoughts and feelings about what I like and/or dislike about my child/children and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that each point that I like or dislike is in fact an indicator of a survival pattern that I have not directed within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself as a parent to feel guilty towards having transferred patterns, etc that are not best for my child to them, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is impossible to support my child to take responsibility for any and all patterns that I have transferred to them that are not best, and thus within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am able to stand and walk my process and support myself and my child as equal as one to take self responsibility and birth oneself as Life, and within this to not allow any point of excuse and to let go of all guilt over consequences that cannot be changed as the past, but to do what is necessary to direct the consequence and change oneself to birth oneself and stand as Life Here.


I commit myself to support myself and my child/children as one as equal to walk the process of birthing oneself here as Life.

I commit myself to investigate, identify, and remove through process of writing, self forgiveness, and self correction application each point where I judge my child/children as either good or bad, as either a like or dislike, as either a hope or a disappointment, and to support my child/children within learning to apply the same tools to support them to take responsibility for the points that I have missed in directing effectively.

A Parasite to Life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am equal to what I accept and allow to exist in reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am equal to what I accept as the belief that only my experience is real and valuable, in the face of reality being such that each one is not able to experience themselves in the best way, and thus I am within that equal to IGNORING the suffering of others while at the same time contributing to it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be equal to concern only for my own survival and experience of positive energy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only value others in how they are able to contribute to my personal experience of positive energy, and that I would disregard those that either do not contribute to it directly or who would in some way diminish, and thus those who suffer in this world through an unequal money system, would have no value in my mind because they only serve to make me feel sad or bad and thus do not contribute to my positive energy experience, and thus within that I would be equal to ignoring how I really feel about reality and thus I have been equal to DENIAL of what is really going on within me and without.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to value family and friend only in the context of how they would contribute to my feelings of happiness and positive energy experience, and thus not valuing the equal and one life that they have been given equal and one to what I have been given.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am not IN FACT equal to what I FOCUS ON or PAY ATTENTION TO, but to what I accept and allow to IN FACT EXIST within the reality of which I am a part.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that each one is in their own reality of their own design and creation, despite the evidence even in my own experience that I am in a reality which requires the coordination and cooperation of others to produce that which my body requires as food, for example, and that this food is only produced by those who do so in order to get money to buy the other things that are required for them to exist, and thus each one is only cooperating in order to stabilize the existence of MY reality through the fear of not surviving, and I am in the same way contributing to everyone else's reality through the same fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place value on creating a DREAM experience which is a total waste of the Gift of Life that I have been given.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the DREAM experience of having lots of wonderful toys and products and vacations is a DREAM PROGRAM that has been installed into me from a young age and that the DESIRE that motivates my yearning and striving for the dream is simply the program of survival that exists as my mind to stimulate me to seek new sources of energy for the Mind to continue to exist, and thus I am not living MY DREAM in fact, but rather FOLLOWING a DREAM PROGRAM that is a FALSE IMAGE designed by a PARASITE just to KEEP ME ENSLAVED to using my physical body and the physical world to continue the energetic existence of a ILLUSIONARY PROGRAM that does not in fact physically exist which is why it requires constant feeding of energy for it to continue.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have been equal to the slave to a parasite.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not realize that if I am allowing myself to be the slave of a parasite and do the bidding of a parasite to Life then I am EQUAL TO A PARASITE TO LIFE.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be EQUAL TO A PARASITE.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to chase and follow a DREAM.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to DESIRE EXPERIENCE instead of focusing on how to express myself in the best way possible in order to create a world that is BEST FOR ALL and that as a metaphor, this is the only 'dream' appropriate to one who is Equal to Life and thus if I am to not squander the GIFT that I have been given then I must be EQUAL to the GIFT which is to say that I must accept myself not as a PARASITE TO LIFE but AS LIFE ITSELF and thus LIVE and ACT equal to and one with Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that due to chasing a dream, I have allowed myself to fuel the existence of an unequal money system which has become a parasite on this planet which completely disregards life and destroys everything in SIGHT in order to continue its own survival only, ignoring the fact that this CANNOT last forever, and thus our end as a human race is certain unless we STOP.

I commit myself to uncover and REMOVE each and every point where I am accepting and allowing myself to be less than EQUAL to Life.

I commit myself to give up the DREAM, to dismantle it, to establish myself Here in physical reality facing what is really here and be/become/stand equal to what is here and direct it as myself and to test all points where a feeling comes up to direct me, to ensure that I am Here in fact and not chasing/following a dream/desire that would not create a world that is best for all.

The Gift of Life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always/generally look at other's weaknesses as a point of comparison with myself in order to generate energy within my mind/experience in the form of feeling superior or frustration towards what I perceive as a weakness, not seeing/realizing/being honest that the REAL weakness is within myself as using the mirror of reality as a way to continue an energy game within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not look for the best/potential within another at ALL TIMES, not realizing that it is possible see/recognize a weakness in another without being judgemental from the perspective of supporting another within facing the weakness and making it a strength, but this would require an ABSOLUTE focus on the POTENTIAL of the other person to change, and thus requires within me the decision to not participate in an energy game, and to have changed the point within myself so that it is no longer a point of self-judgment that is being projected.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to BELIEVE in superiority and inferiority not realizing that LIFE is equal in all and that any perception/existence of superiority/inferiority is either a judgment that self is using as an excuse to not change within oneself and/or is a point that self has accepted and allowed to be created through time by not taking full self-responsibility and therefore there is no valid point of judgment of another as weakness or inferiority or superiority or strength, because in some way or another I am responsible for the existence of everything that is Here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize fully that seeking energy through judgment of others through comparison of an idea of myself to an idea of another, regardless of what I see/perceive as physical/mental evidence is always a form of self-interest and is therefore a complete disregard for the Equal Life in another that was given to them and me equally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that every moment that I play an energy seeking game through comparison and judgement is a moment where Life is lost, where I am spiting the gift of Life that I have been given and that may never be given again, and that it is not that I should recognize the gift of Life from the starting point of Fear of Loss, but that not honoring the gift of Life within me is simply just not realizing and appreciating the true magnitude and possibility of what I could Be and Become and experience and Live and participate in and be a part of if I WERE to recognize and appreciate and honor the gift of Life that I have been given.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take the gift of Life that I have been given for granted.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have been placing the experience of power, which is temporary in any case, as more valuable than the gift of Life that I have been given.

I forgive myself that I have been deliberately spiteful and at times naive or ignorant of what I have been given as a gift as Life and that I have been squandering it with no real appreciation for what I have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that Life is mysterious as this indicates the degree to which I have separated myself from Life and thus the REAL MYSTERY would be what could and would happen if I were to receive this Gift of Life with open arms and with the intention and self-direction to recognize the gift in everyone and to use my gift to ensure that all are ABLE to recognize their gift of Life and to use it and express it fully.

I forgive myself that I have been afraid at times that my Life will someday be gone, and that I would experience this fear of loss but then not see within it that deep down I KNOW that Life is precious and should be used/expressed in the BEST WAY possible and not just for a temporary experience that is not the BEST POSSIBLE way of using the gift, not to simply pursue the experience of having money or feeling happy or feeling powerful or any of the myriad ways in which one can experience themselves as energy or as the pursuit of energy, but to use/be/express Life as equal to what Life is, which is Expansion into the BEST possible expression, to go beyond ANY and ALL limits, even when the limits seem real and impossible to expand beyond, and to perfect oneself WITHIN the limitation but in a way that supports the perfection of ALL within the limitation, not just EXPERIENCE of perfection, but the reality of being the best one can be within the context of what is best for all and everyone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself believe that I am an individual when in fact I really don't know what I am, and regardless of what I am or am not, why wouldn't I want to be the best for myself and everyone else?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am in everyone, that I am Life, and that each one is Life and we are thus different manifestations of the same thing which is equally valuable, and that even though it seems like some are better and some are worse, that this just the consequence of not recognizing and acting within the recognition of what really makes us all equal and equally valuable, and that even those that seem 'better' are still SO LIMITED within their expression and experience and even they are still in the same fear that I am within losing this gift of life that we have been given.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the best way to use the gift I have been given is to allow all to receive the same gift, which is simply to first recognize that each one is/has Life and is thus equally valuable.

I commit myself to show and explain and demonstrate that the only true form of giving as one wants to receive is to find the point within oneself within where one is at in the system and to find a way to become effective and to stand in a way that supports the system that determines each one's value according to how much money they have/how much money they can make - to support that system to change so that it recognizes that all ARE ALREADY EQUALLY VALUABLE and that way we can have a system that ensures each one gets what they need to FULLY USE and EXPRESS that gift.

I commit myself to FIND and SUPPORT those who want to stand and walk together to change this system so that the ability for each to live here and express fully is supported and to do WHATEVER IT TAKES, which is simply COMMUNICATION and expansion beyond one's current position in life, and to support each one within their potential, to recognize the best within them, which is Life, which is the potential to change from ignoring the gift they have within them to accessing it and expressing it regardless of how the system and people within the system react, to never stop, to never give up, and to go beyond every perceived limit in order to USE the GIFT that I have been GIVEN equally as each one has TO THE FULLEST in the BEST WAY POSSIBLE.

The Difference Between An Athiest, a Christian, and an Agnostic

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that there is no difference between any human being based on what they believe as religion or lack of religion.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the fundamental starting point of the athiest, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, spiritual, agnostic, etc is exactly the same as seeking energy as experience within oneself as self-interest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that all beliefs are a form of separation, and even starting point of 'I don't believe anything' is still a form of separation because 'not believing' is not the same as BEING one and equal to the physical, mind, and energy as taking self responsibility for what one has allowed oneself to be and become as evidenced by the world as it currently exists.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that there is no fundamental difference between any human being as we have all accepted and allowed ourselves to become addicted to the experience of energy within ourselves.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that whether a person is negative or positive, there is no fundamental difference because the starting point of what the person lives and exists as is still the pursuit and direction by energy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the extent to which we as humanity have given up our self-directive wills to be directed by our minds through the pursuit of energy, and thus the mind of each human being is like the God of their existence, where the human believes they exercising their own free choice, but in fact are just following the commands of their own personal God, not even to their own benefit, but just to the benefit of the mind itself as being able to continue its existence to find a way to get its human host to reproduce and train the new child to copy the patterns of the parent's mind so that the mind is able to continue, while the being in the physical body ceases to exist and therefore is less than the mind itself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that this pattern of living as the mind's slave and copying thus pattern into our children can be stopped once and for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself as a parent to not question the beliefs that I pass on to my child through stories and behaviors that would perpetuate the religion of Self-Interest within the child, meanwhile distracting myself with ideas of choosing what religion to participate in or not participate in, when it is irrelevant because the seed of self religion is the same regardless of the external form that it takes and expresses itself as.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that all religions and belief systems, including science, athiesm, skepticism and philosophy are based on a specialized vocabulary, the content of which is words charged with energy that only support the context of the person adhering to the particular system to remain in a constant state of focus on self-interest at the creation of experiences in the pursuit of energy in order to satisfy the thoughts and feelings being generated by one's body that were programmed in through the mind by the parent, school, religions, and media.

I commit myself to stand up within myself to investigate and identify the patterns which are still causing me to act in automated ways that are only designed to create conflict and participate in the circulation of energy to refuel the mind and in no way produce a result physically that is best for myself and everyone else.

I commit myself to show parents that despite their 'best intentions' they are not actually showing true love to their children because they are not even questioning themselves in what they are participating in and what they are listening to and following as the contents of their mind directing their decisions and pursuing only what the money system presents to them as options to exercise as 'free choice' that are all only designed to keep the parent and the child as a consumer participating in the system that only benefits a few and causes massive suffering for most.

Questioning Purpose

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize my real responsibility to myself and this world within what I know about the actual source of all the problems on this planet.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize my true purpose.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my purpose is within something that I decide based on feelings and desires, when in fact feelings and desires have been programmed within me to keep me as nothing more than a consumer slave in the system and to never stand up and do what is best for all as adjusting the system so that all have what they need to express themselves Here equally as one as what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my purpose is something that I have to discover through self-honesty about what is currently existing as myself and as this world, and to deconstruct within myself how I have created myself and thus this world together with everyone as one and equal to what it is now, and thus my true purpose is something that is existent already within the decision to stand up for what is best and that any other purpose that is not within that context is in fact a purpose given to me by the system and is not best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my true purpose is to stand up in this system, to be an example of change that is best for all, and to speak up about how to change oneself and this system to reflect the inner change so that all forms of Life on this planet are supported equally according to their design and to support all forms of Life to grow, expand, and become better within the context of improving the balance within what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not understand the word equilibrium in the context of what is best for all as growth, change, expansion within improvement of the balance that would exist when all parts of reality are acting and existing within the context of what is best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define change only within the context of competition for survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define evolution only in the context of survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that all information and knowledge of this world, generated by the system and by the mind, is all designed to reinforce the belief/knowledge/acceptance that the system cannot change because the human cannot change and to thus instill in everyone the belief/knowledge that there is no such thing as self direction and thus purpose is something given to one from an authority outside of oneself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that even when a purpose is generated within oneself but based on feelings and thoughts and emotions and desires, that this purpose is still actually being given to one from an external authority because the mind itself is a copy of the system of consciousness which is based purely on generating energy through conflict for the system's survival as an energy machine, and this is why radical self honesty is required within oneself to ensure that one is not simply just going along with what the mind wants which would never change things externally to be best for all but only produce more conflict in the world and thus in one's life - death being the most prominent and certain form of conflict for everyone, and extreme daily suffering being the most common for the average life form on earth.

I commit myself to investigate and question through self honest self forgiveness every point where a desire and feeling and thought directs my sense of purpose and to only rely on common sense based on self honesty as to what I have accepted and allowed as what is not best both within myself and without and to only give to myself that purpose which is in alignment with taking responsibility for what is here within and without that is not best to realign it to be best for all.

Circumstances as a Mirror of What We Accept and Allow

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that all circumstances in this world and in my individual experience as what I have called 'my life' are the result of small moments, breath by breath that have accumulated over time to present themselves as a 'condition' or 'circumstance' or 'event' and that these things do not just 'happen' all at once, there is no 'overnight success' or 'random disaster' - it is all actions and decisions that have accumulated over time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the basic common sense that a consequence is something that can be prevented by directing all of the decisions that lead to the consequence in a way that prevents it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that MANY children are being diagnosed with learning disabilities and disorders and attention disorders but without any focus being placed on how the child was treated and educated in the first 3 years where the parents and the environment was the main influencers and shapers of everything the child saw, heard, and felt and that these experiences form memories within the child and form the foundation of the child's ability to learn, focus, communicate, pay attention, etc.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to utilize the excuse that everything is so complicated and more than one person can handle as a way to not face the consequences that have been allowed to manifest over time that we, as humans, now call circumstances, conditions, and human nature.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame the conditions instead of realizing that the conditions are a mirror as to what I have accepted and allowed to accumulate as consequence of my acceptance and allowance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in apathy as a way to not face consequence and take the time to walk back through what I have accepted and allowed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see how I have created conditions that seem to place me in the position of the victim.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to view parenting through the lens of good and bad instead of realizing and seeing that parenting is really a matter of what is best, and that if a child is supported with examples and consistency within always choosing what is best, then they will develop a character and personality that always supports what is best.


I commit myself to show how all conditions and circumstances are a result of small measures allowed to accumulate over time.

I commit myself to support parents to see how a child's behavior is the accumulation of all the influences that have been accepted and allowed, and that the best way to support a child is to first take responsibility for oneself as a parent, and then to support the child to walk back through the the points that are creating the behavior.

I commit myself to show that all behavior problems are really problems of vocabulary where the child is living certain words ineffectively or is limited within their ability to express themselves.

Fear of Survival as the Basis of Reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that all feelings of love and joy are always in contrast with fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have participated in the idea and feeling of love in order to cover up the basic fact that my and everyone's entire existence is based on fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the constant, continuous fear in everyone at all times.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that everyone, no matter where they are or who they are with is always in fear as a basic point of reality, and that while it is possible to cover up the feeling of fear at times through creating experiences of happiness and fun for example, these are really nothing more than distractions, because no matter what experiences I or anyone create to escape the feeling of fear, fear is still the basis of reality, because no one is able to exist without competing for survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize and see that the system we live in is busy collapsing in on itself, like a supergiant star that has used up all of its fuel and is now collapsing on the weight of its own gravity, the system we live in is based on competition, which is always constantly separating and dividing people from each other and this cannot last forever, because in order for even one person to be left at the top, everyone else is left in fear of each other and thus no real cooperation or love is existing, because noone trusts each other at any level - not spouses, not parent and child, not brother and sister, not business partners, no one, because at the end of the day, everyone is a competitor to one' s self in a system based on competition for survival.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to buy in to the game of competition for survival, even directly justifying it at times.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let things get this bad on the earth in order to wake up and realize and see the consequence of my original decision to compete with myself for energy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to demonize negativity and to place positivity on a pedestal, when in reality the only thing that exists fundamentally at the moment is negativity, which is why negativity seems to come so easily and positivity seems to require lots of work to create and maintain and only lasts for a fleeting moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not really care about my own existence fundamentally, certainly not enough to really question the nature of reality as it is currently existing and what I have accepted and allowed within myself as who I am and what I am willing to participate or allow to even exist without my direct participation, meanwhile just looking out for my own experience, pretending and lying to myself that experience is of any value in itself, especially in spite of things being so dire in reality for so many.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty about living in a first world country, and to allow this feeling of guilt to manipulate me into not changing, when it is my responsibility to change so that there is no division between first and second or third world, because this is all one world, and the division lines are not real, and it is only a matter of time before everyone is on the losing end of a system that is competitive by nature.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing positivity, love, feeling good, when in fact I don't have these things anyway, and that is because they are not ensured for everyone, and thus if they are not, then I am always in fear of not having them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to listen to fear, to buy into it, to believe that by listening to it that I can save myself somehow, when the only thing that can save me or anyone is to do what is best and to not stop until the systems that automate the distribution of basic needs, for a start, are giving to all what they need.

I commit myself to stop fear within myself.

I commit myself to use writing and self forgiveness to root out the fear within me, to find the structures that keep me in fear, to stop participating in the positive which creates the fear of loss to further create more positive, and to investigate until I get to the bottom of how I have instilled fear within me as a base motivator and automated point within me that is so far keeping me existing only as a mind seeking energy without regard for Life.

I commit myself to utilize the tools of writing, self-forgiveness, and self-corrective action to eliminate fear within myself, to prove that fear is irrelevant, that fear is only something that holds us back from creating a world that is best for all, and that there is no excuse or reason to listen to fear or to manipulate oneself with fear, and to be a living example to others that stopping fear is not only possible, but that it is best.

Nothing is Coming to Savior Ass or Mine

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hope that a solution to my problems and to the problems in this world will come.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am the solution to 'my problems' and to the problems of this world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have been waiting for a solution instead of directing myself in each moment breath by breath within what is best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only be willing to move myself when I know money is coming as a reward.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire the good life but not be willing to make it possible for others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want something for nothing, when I am in a position to give so that others may receive and in fact receive for myself as well.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and feel that my responsibility is a burden when it is in fact the key to my freedom.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I could just get enough money, then I would feel good and be motivated to do something in this world that would be best, when in fact I am using this belief to control myself to stay in a pattern of waiting for a savior to come and make me feel better without having to do anything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that if I act as what is best that Life will support me, as Life is the principle that is lying dormant deep down within me that sees no limitation and only sees possibility as what is best, and that I must simply ACTivate this within and go with what is best in every moment and I will see that SO MUCH MORE is possible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to listen to the doubts and the fears that my mind presents to me in my own inner voice as if they were valid and to even argue on their behalf for my own limitation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the inner voice is a program placed into my from my parents (unknowingly) and the system to make sure that I will never present a point of competition to those whose lives are benefiting from the mass slavery of the human race and all other forms of life on earth.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be enslaved by the thoughts and feelings within myself which would indicate that I am the weakest form of life on earth that I could be held back from doing what is best simply by a thought or a feeling which is not even real, when I have a physical body capable of amazing feats and that all I must do is stand up, speak, and act as what is best and through this, this is the only way that I can prove that I am worthy of Life in fact.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I deserve a good life when I am not willing to lift a finger to ensure that ALL have a good life, because there is nothing in this world other than individuals, like me, and thus if I am not the first, then WHO WILL BE?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall into the trap of self interest time and again, each time justifying the fall, but at the same time knowing that I am falling, and then hiding, and the looking for someone or something to take responsibility for me, but I know that by doing so I am only allowing consequences to compound and that this is in fact unacceptable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to no realize that I am capable of so much more than I currently am realizing, and that all I must/can do is stand up, and do what I see is possible in this moment as what is best, and then I will see more in the next breath, and thus breath by breath I will accumulate what is best and therefore stand as a living example to others who would then see it as possible for themselves to do the same, and that there is NO OTHER WAY that the problems on this planet will be sorted out, as there is NOTHING ELSE that exists other than us, and by ME not standing and directing myself within what is best, things will ONLY GET WORSE, because I have accepted and allowed a system to be created in my name that has automated the constant continuous creations of what is NOT BEST.

I commit myself to STOP ALL EXCUSES, and to move within what is best in each moment, to not give myself a break, to not allow any point where I do not question a feeling or a thought, to go ALL IN, to never give up, to stand in the face of those who are accepting themselves as less than what they really are, to do the same for myself, to be ONLY ONE if necessary, but within this to NOT ACCEPT bullshit from others as I do not accept bullshit from myself.

I commit myself to push myself beyond all perceived limits, to STOP FEAR, to no longer give FEAR POWER, and to PROVE TO MYSELF that FEAR IS NOT MY MASTER, and that I alone am responsible for myself and what I create as the accumulation of my effect in this world breath by breath.

Please, Distract Me!

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only want to see things on the news that paint a pretty picture about what is happening on earth.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I only look at pretty images that make me feel good then the earth and life will reflect this inner feeling, when in fact the good feeling that I have is only because I have access to money, and that if I were in a position without money, looking at pretty pictures would not make me feel better except for the point of motivating my desire to make money to create that pretty picture for myself, regardless of what I create in the world as a consequence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I focus on feeling good within, I am actually only focused on my own self interest and thus I am ignoring the suffering that is occurring daily on the planet, not to mention the suffering of my own physical body which I am mining for energy in order to experience a good feeling.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have never questioned the system that is running this world, automatically producing events and situations that are in fact extremely negative as abuse of people, animals, plants, and the physical environment, in order to generate money, which I use to make myself feel good through creating a personal environment where I am surrounded with that which I need and desire as food, shelter, technology, entertainment, etc.

I forgive myself that I have never accepted and allowed myself to realize that entertainment is nothing more than a pretty picture that I use to distract myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that even being entertained by 'negative' images is still a form of distraction because it supports my mind to 'experience' a negative temporarily to then justify seeking a positive state of feeling good, in contrast to the negative.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider the physical toll that making a move, for instance, has on the physical environment and those involved who have to slave away to create a pretend picture for me to distract myself with, or the news, for instance, where someone is required to spend their whole life just putting pictures together for me to experience and thus even my entertainment requires a money system to enslave others to sacrifice their lives creating a picture for me, while I completely ignore the real picture in front of my very eyes as the physical world replete with suffering, abuse, murder, war, starvation, poverty, child abuse, child sacrifice, and so many abhorrent things that I shield myself from using entertainment and positive, pretty pictures to distract my physical body from realizing that I am enslaving it along with the rest of the physical existence just to create a temporary, good feeling within myself that I know, self honestly, cannot last, which is why the system must constantly evolve new ways to distract/entertain me and everyone else, so that we never realize what we are participating in, and yet I cannot self-honestly blame the system, because this is actually what I have asked for and placed value on with my dollars so that I can continue with the energy game within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame the media and the elite for producing entertainment and news that distracts when it would not be produced if no one were going to consume it, and further, I cannot blame another for taking advantage of a system that I am taking advantage of within the exact same starting point to generate money for myself to be able to experience as good a life as possible regardless of the physical toll on my body and this physical world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that searching for/seeking positive energy experience is actually a form of entertainment when the physical world is suffering and that the energy game is in itself of no value and that if I were truly a creative being I would stop looking for ways to entertain myself with energy and I would focus all of my attention on the physical world to find/create/promote solutions to the physical problems that exist - an unequal money and education being the two prominent ones that would have the greatest impact on reducing suffering and creating prosperity and a life of dignity for all equally.

I commit myself to investigate, question, and stop all the forms and ways in which I distract myself from what is really Here on earth through not wanting to see a negative image that is in fact showing what is really Here or wanting to see a positive image that misrepresents our current reality or entertains/distracts me while I allow the system to continue as is.

I commit myself to investigate and expose the ways in which the system automatically produces distractions to entertain people to not stand up and adjust the system so that the NEED to be distracted no longer exists, and to investigate and stand within all the ways in which media/business can be used to support people to stand up within themselves and walk this process of self-correction and world-system correction until the system is brought to a point of supporting what is best for all equally as one. 

The Inner Voice as Inner Vice

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not realize that every thought, every word that forms the inner voice of my self-talk, is always trying to convince me in some way that I am either better than another or less than another and in some way to justify my existence as a consumer of products which reinforce a self image that is always seeking to be superior to others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the inner voice is not something that I can trust to ever produce what is best for me and for all, because it is the product of memories that have been placed into me over my entire life and over generations through the copying of the mind from parent to child, in order to keep my controlled as a physical body to never stand up and do what is best from the perspective of the real physical world, but only as a slave to the system of consumption of people, resources, plants, animals - this entire physical existence - for the purpose of profit which is the pursuit of energy for the experience of the individual which is something that cannot last for the individual and thus really only exists for the survival of a program of control of individuals, though, because I as an individual have bought into the lies of the inner voice, I have accepted and allowed a belief that I as an individual in the context of my experiences and feelings is somehow more than everything that exists physically, when common sense shows that the individual experience is extremely limited and obviously temporary while the physical reality is the only thing that is real and is what is making the individual experience possible in the first place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have formed, over time, a habit of listening to and participating in the inner voice conversation, and that I have bought into the reward of the inner voice conversation as a form of either gossip about another that makes me feel superior or as a form of gossip about myself that makes me feel inferior and that either way causes/motivates me to act in a way to attempt to gain energy at the expense of the physical world..

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never really question where the inner voice comes from, and to even participate in the belief that the inner voice is the ONLY thing that can be trusted which is like completely buying to the control system that benefits only the profit of the corporation and the individuals who own and control them so that I remain a slave to the consumer system and that buying into the idea of the inner voice is like being a slave who admires their chains and polishes them and brags about them and asks for bigger and better chains all the while wishing that one could be in the position of the slave master, which is the most ridiculous, stupid thing that exists, and yet I and everyone else are doing this, day in day out, moment by moment, breath by breath, participating in this inner voice control mechanism so that we are not here for real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the reason I don't trust anyone else really is because I know that they are participating in the inner voice conversation within themselves just as I am and I know what the content of that conversation is like within me and thus I assume that everyone is just as evil and screwed up, and yet no one, not even myself, has been willing to really stop, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear giving up the inner voice conversation and being someone who lives in the physical, as the physical completely regardless of what anyone else is doing, and that within this I realize that I can find ways to get through to others just as someone got through to me and I am now taking responsibility for stopping the mind as the inner voice and no longer accepting myself as a slave.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my inner voice as an inner guidance system is always right, when has been in fact programmed by my parents and environment to always lead me to find ways to be a better consumer, and thus it is not supporting me to walk what is BEST.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that believing that the inner guidance system as my thoughts and feelings is the ONLY THING that I should listen to is equivalent to simply calling up a corporation and asking them what products I should buy - they are never going to tell me what is really best, but only what supports their profits, and thus within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that it is the CORPORATIONS THEMSELVES that have designed my inner guidance system through the images and sounds that I am exposed to on a constant, daily basis through advertising.

I commit myself to stopping participation in the inner voice conversation, no matter how challenging or tempting it is because I KNOW that it has no value, and that if I must talk to myself inside, then why can't I share that with others unless I am deliberately trying to have a conversation in secret which would imply that my starting point is to compete for survival, which is not real living and will never produce a world that is best for all.

I commit myself to continue to walk the process of reading Creation's Journey to Life and Heaven's Journey to Life blogs, listening to the EQAFE recordings, writing self-forgiveness daily, daily assessing my process and identifying points where I am still compromising myself as a physical being as Life, stopping participation in my mind, using TechnoTutor daily to support myself to redefine my vocabulary, and to stand as a living example that this process can be walked by anyone and that there is no excuse not to do so.