Application through Time vs Instant Gratification

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a victim to the feelings produced by my body that I have in fact programmed in to be generated automatically to direct me into a state of pursuing self-interest in order generate positive energy as experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a slave to thinking.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have chained myself to the experience of negative feelings as a motivator and stimulus to seek out positive energy through experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the extent to which I have formed relationships in my world in order to automatically, within the context of the relationship, create a positive energy experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire instant gratification.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want GRATIFICATION which is the fulfillment of self-interest as energy experience, which is a form of TAKING, when stopping self-interest and only GIVING what is best for all would eventually result in the RECEIVING of GRATITUDE which would be the receiving of what is best for me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sit and THINK about all the ways in which I can achieve a grandiose, magnificent result, which within the thinking itself I experience the energy and exhilaration of the achievement of the result, which is like another form of orgasm that one would experience as the buildup within a relationship within sex, and yet if the discipline to produce the result is not there, then the result one imagined and THOUGHT about never materializes, and thus this thinking is in fact like a form of mental masturbation where I ALONE WIN and yet I also immediately am placed in the position of the loser because I was only generating energy for the mind to continue existing and not in any way producing a result that is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not develop the self-discipline through application, moment by moment, and support myself within self-mastery to in each moment direct myself according to the logic of what is best for all within common sense as to whether or not my actions within moment would accumulate to the result that is best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the relationships that I have formed through my mind within/towards my physical body and the physical reality were formed through time, through decisions made in time, reinforced through time, and acted upon in/through time and thus the solution to stopping and reversing these relationships is not something that will happen immediately, as it must be walked through/in time, and that this would constitute the 'proof' of who I am as no longer willing to accept and allow myself to create and engage in relationships that are not best for all.

Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that it is not enough to 'stop participating' in these relationships but to actively deconstruct them through writing, self-forgiveness, and corrective application as is being walked in this blog.

I commit myself to walk this process, step by step, moment by moment, day by day, in each breath, disengaging in the pursuit of energy, while also daily deconstructing through investigation and self-forgiveness the relationships that are causing the energy pursuit or the consequence of energy experience which happens in a moment to continue coming up.

I commit myself to show that are best for all are not going to be instantaneous while most people/the system/myself have not completely stopped all relationships that are not best and reformed each point of interaction between all parts of reality to only support that which is best for all, and thus only at that point would one expect/know that a result that is best would be instantaneous because it would be the manifestation of the entire collective agreement/movement as what is best for all, and thus until that point is reached, I realize that I am still facing consequences that must walked through and not participated in while stopping the automation of these consequences and thus supporting myself and each one in this reality as one as equal to do the same as a point of self-responsibility, and that this is the only way, and yet the certain way, that reality will eventually be directed to produce always what is best for all at all times and in all ways.