Patterns of Frustration

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be disappointed, to feel disappointment, to feel sadness, and frustration when my child goes into an emotional pattern.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my child for going into an emotional pattern of, for example, frustration, to which I then react with frustration, showing that it is I who have taught the child the pattern in the first place, and thus I am the one who is responsible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for being frustrated that I have taught my child frustration.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize what frustration really is.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that physical frustration is the impeding of progress or completion of something, and thus in itself, is not an emotion, and yet I have accepted and allowed myself to react emotionally when something I am doing is impeded from moving forward or when I am stopped from continuing something or completing something I am focused on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel despondent about my child getting emotionally frustrated when they are impeded within something, not realizing that I am thus placing the responsibility to support them outside of myself, hence the despondence, and thus if I can understand my own frustration experience, then I can support my child to understand theirs.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is normal to FEEL frustrated when something doesn't go the way that I want it to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I feel frustrated when I don't understand why something is impeding me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I feel frustrated when I have created an internal energy towards something, and thus the feeling of being frustrated is really the experience of energy within myself towards something being impeded, and thus it is really the experience of either not having the energy continue within me or not getting the energy experience that I was expecting that is causing the FEELING of frustration.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a feeling of depression and/or anger in moments where I do not get something that I was expecting, and thus it is the expectation that is the issue, from the perspective of building up an energetic experience towards the point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that creating energetic expectations and participating in energy puts me at a disadvantage in a physical reality where I do not control all the variables, and never will, because I am in a reality of collective agreement, not one where I control everything, and thus I must come to terms with this, and realize that the key for me is to stop participating in energy within myself in my mind and rather be here physically looking at what is really going on and seeing what can be worked within in that context.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to control how my child plays with toys which is really just me wanting to create an energetic experience within myself and to transfer that to my child and within that create another layer of energy within reflecting on what I have created as a copy of me in my child.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the extend to which I am projecting my experience onto my child and creating conflict within that between my child and me.

I commit myself to develop the awareness that my child is a reflection of me and to in those moments where I feel frustrated towards my child to realize, to see, that the child is me, and to stop and to breathe, and to let go of the energy - to support me in that moment, firstly, and thus to prepare myself to be able to support my child as well to let go in those moments - realizing that I cannot demand that my child do something I am not willing to do.

Why Do We Get Frustrated With Children?

For context see this video: 2 1/2 year old helping unload the dishwasher

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that a child can process information at a far superior level to what most people believe is possible, and from a young age.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the reason I become frustrated when my child asks me to explain something is because I know they lack the vocabulary to understand and in many cases I do as well.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I could develop a clear, functional, stable relationship of trust with my child if I were to support them to develop an effective vocabulary early on and explain things to them in as much detail as possible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rather believe that I can parent any way I want and it really doesn't matter anyway because my child is going to turn out less than their best anyway, so why does it matter?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself to be the very best possible parent and not accept or allow any limitations.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I can redevelop my own vocabulary effectively so that I could communicate with my children, my spouse, and myself more effectively and that it can be a simple process though it will take time and discipline and effort.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that children are just what they are, that I am here to just not get in the way, when in reality I am the major influence in who they become along with my spouse and anyone else in the environment often when the child is in the first 7 years of their life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place my self interest above what is best for my child.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that my self interest is not really best for me, it is in fact just a form of fear that my mind uses to control me to keep generating energy for the existence of characters so that I never live for real and I pass this fear on to my children.

I commit myself to discipline myself everyday to build and re-establish my vocabulary to be aligned with what is best for all and to support my child to develop an effective vocabulary and understanding of how to live in a way that is best for all.

I commit myself to show parents that there is a best way to support their children within education and that one does not have to be an 'expert' as the experts have shown through time to not know what they are doing other than create children who are slaves to an unequal economic system, and to show parents that they can in fact change and become the best living example for their children.

The Manipulation to Fulfill Desire Character

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to develop a pattern from a young age of wanting to manipulate others in order to create an experience that I have placed energy into as desire.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see others as an impediment or a stepping stone to fulfilling my desire.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that in a moment where, having built up a desire for something, and then seeing that it is not best to fulfill it, to believe that I am not able to stop and let it go, that I MUST do whatever it takes to fulfill that desire.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that it is a character that speaks through my mind that is attempting to get energy for itself to continue existing as a construct and that if it doesn't then it experiences a form of dying, which I experience and believe to be me dying in a certain sense, but in reality, when I breathe, let it go, it eventually passes and I am still here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as a bad, manipulative person, when the reality is that I have just given authority to a program of attempting to manipulate my environment and others in order to fulfill a desire, and thus I am not bad or manipulative inherently, because I can forgive myself and stop.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not remember when/how I developed the character of manipulating others to fulfill a desire, and to within that believe that I can't possibly get to the root of it in order to stop it, when all that is required is self-honesty, self-forgiveness for what I CAN see at the moment and the willingness to breathe through and stop in moments when it comes up, and to further deconstruct the pattern through writing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the world and others can change and I can still hold onto my character of wanting to manipulate and fulfill desires.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am physical body, where words have become flesh, and thus the words and sounds and energy and patterns that I have accepted over time have come to direct me and thus I realize now that it will take time to stop these patterns and that it may get intense from time to time, but this is not a reason to stop or give up, because it may just be that it gets intense before I transcend a pattern.

I commit myself to breathe and not participate in the character of wanting to manipulate others in order to create an experience to fulfill a desire, to let go, in those moments, of the desire - to allow myself to find out and see who I am beyond the desire and the fulfillment of desire - to discover who I am without desire just being here looking at what is best.

I commit myself to further investigate and deconstruct this character of manipulation to fulfill a desire through writing, self forgiveness, and self commitment to change/stop the patterns.

The Excuse Within Expectation

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, that as a being, nothing can actually hurt me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that another's words cannot actually hurt me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear experiencing fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the extent to which I am controlled within what I do or don't do based on the experience of fear or the fear of experiencing fear within me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe there is anything that another can do that I cannot do, when in reality the other is actually me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place value on the energetic experience of feeling bad and feeling good and feeling neutral.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel pressure around my eyes, in my chest, in my stomach and to then accept this pressure as feeling as something that directs me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to face how weak I have allowed myself to be within allowing myself to be directed by an energy experience within me, not realizing that who I really am is the principle which makes even the energy experience possible, so how can an energy experience really affect me if I do not accept it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself and become angry within myself for accepting and allowing myself to be directed by emotions and feelings, when in fact doing so is still accepting and allowing myself to be directed by such.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in feeling frustrated when things to do move as quickly as I want them to, when this happens because I have created an expectation within myself that something should happen and imbued this expectation with energy and I haven't really done my due diligence to see what is actually required and what it will take for what I would like to happen to in fact happen.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from that which I want to happen and thus not allow myself to really see clearly what is required to make it happen.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the energy of despondence when something doesn't happen as quickly as I would like.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in expectation of others and myself, instead of focusing on that which is required to be done that is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use feeling frustrated as an excuse to participate in the mind as feelings and emotions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to second guess my actions based on feeling bad, without first checking where the 'negative' feeling is coming from within me and to instead base my assessment of my actions on common sense and measuring the physical result.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in anger instead of breathing and being here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in feeling afraid instead of being here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to control others in order to suppress my fear and anger, instead of breathing, and bringing the energy back to myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that things need to move quickly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is a pressure for me to get something done, when that is a feeling that my body is generating based on how I have accepted and allowed it to be programmed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am able to direct myself and others as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the word patience and not realize that patience is simply letting go of expectation and supporting/directing what is required in the moment in a way that is best for all.

I commit myself to when the feeling of frustration about how things are moving comes up within me, to breathe, to let it go, to realize that this is a program and to once I am stable within breathing, look at what points I am not taking self-responsibility for that require direction.

I commit myself to push beyond all excuses to participate in the mind and learn what it means to live here physically without desire, without want, without feelings that direct me, but to direct myself as what is best.

I commit myself to never give up on myself, to stand up no matter how many times I fall into the mind, into energy, to get back up more quickly, to eventually never fall and remain here, stable, and support/direct the creation of a system that is best for all life, so that eventually every child born will not have to go through what I have had to go through, and instead can live Life fully without any fear.

The I of the Storm

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame another when I feel angry or frustrated.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the anger and frustration that I feel is never coming from another person, it is always and only ever due to the way in which I have accepted and allowed myself to program my body to respond to certain types of stimuli with the feeling of anger and/or frustration.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, in moments of feeling angry and frustrated, to argue with another from that starting point, when in fact arguing from that starting point is only an attempt to justify the anger and frustration and to find a point of blame in order to convert the negative feeling of anger/frustration into a positive feeling as winning or righteousness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that being angry or frustrated within myself is the same as directly emotionally abusing myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the emotional storm that comes up in a moment is real and has actual control over me, when in fact, the only reason it has control is due to my giving it authority over me, through time, through decisions, through acting within the starting point of the feelings, and that even though I am able to stop participation in a moment through breath, and release myself through self-forgiveness, this does not mean the emotional storm will not come back, because I must also investigate the relationships that I have created and formed which are designed to create the storm automatically.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the missing key of self corrective action/application that is required in order to truly change myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that self-forgiveness alone will not change me, as the CHANGE occurs within and as ME changing the way in which I interact in the world and within my relationships to myself and others, and thus Self-Forgiveness is a KEY however not the only key, as it is only an initial point for me to be able to face the point of then actually changing how I interact, how I behave, how I see things and respond to things within me and the world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame the world and other people for how I feel.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have 'dealt' with something because I have done self-forgiveness, but I have not done the self-honest point of checking the physical relationship and seeing whether in self-honesty I have in fact changed and am no longer controlling another or being controlled through the relationship in order to continue creating conflict/friction/energy in order to fuel my mind and self-interest and thus not truly be HERE and doing what is best.

I commit myself to walk this process effectively, to investigate my reactions to myself and my world and to apply self-forgiveness to give myself the opportunity of release from the pattern and to uncover and explain to myself within that what exactly needs to be changed that is not designed in a way that is best for all and to then apply myself within the physical corrective action required to change that relationship through time in order to adjust it to be best for all.

I commit myself to show that the process described above is the key to changing oneself as the inner process as well as changing oneself as the outer process in terms of taking responsibility for what has been accepted and allowed to function as systems in this world in the name of humanity, and to thus adjust those systems so that they function in a way that is best for all.