Stability

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go out looking for an argument or to create a conflict in order to prove that I am right or superior.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I seek out conflict in order to experience the energy within someone arguing with me and either feeling afraid or less than, which is an energy experience, which I then use to go back and argue again in order to win, or I experience the winning energy of superiority and righteousness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have an addiction to the energy experience of feeling right or feeling like I have won or that someone thinks or believes that I am right or better than them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have a low self-esteem within this I attempt to 'make myself feel better' by creating conflicts where I can prove my superiority, but within this all that I am doing is feeding a constructs desire for energy that exists as a character in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to seek out and participate in conflicts and arguments in order get the experience of being right or winning because I think/feel that I need to prove to myself that I am strong and can win.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as a young child, my life was quite unstable, and thus I have developed a personality and character that uses intellect, knowledge, and argument in order to have a sense of control over myself, my environment, and others to give myself the feeling of stability that I believe I lack.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that stability does not come from winning an argument with another.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the only thing I am keeping 'stable' so to speak is the existence of a character/personality/construct that seeks out conflict and argument in order to try and win.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that stability is here as my physical body, breathing, and it is within physical structures, not energy, and thus I can establish myself in a moment as stable, here, by breathing and letting go of the energy experience and desire for energy experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that it is by me and others participating in the mind in the pursuit of energy and ignoring what we are doing to physical reality in terms of how we are allowing it/creating it to be structured that is allowing/creating instability within the experiences/lives of so many beings on this planet, and I have placed my focus on trying to win in order to get a sense or feeling of stability instead being stable, breathing, looking at what is not best in my environment as structure that is creating instability in the world that is creating, for example, situations where parents are not able to give their children what they really require, as was the case with my childhood, and thus created the feeling and construct of seeking 'stability' as a feeling within me as a child.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the word 'stability' within the context of the mind/consciousness/energy within only a feeling that I personally have defined as the ability to win arguments through the use of my intellect and knowledge.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the word stability within the context of feeling, as stability is the ability to maintain a feeling within myself of power, excitement, security, comfort.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that stability for it to be best for all, must create an OUTCOME for all that is best equally and within this I see that the word stability can be redefined to a structure that always produces what is best at all times with no whim or chance or bias, where for example a stable money system would be one that ensures that each child, adult, animal, plant, etc always receives what they required in order to exist in their specific form in the optimal way, in the way that supports them contributing to the balance of what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that stability comes from who I am as the decision to apply myself within the tools of writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application in order to change myself to remove that which is not best as who I am as what I have defined as my nature and to thus do the same without in the system to remove those elements that are creating instability in the lives of so many to recreate the system in the image and likeness of true stability which is directing resources, activity, etc to all parts equally according to what they require to exist in the best way at all times.

I commit myself to SHOW that stability is not something that one feels, it is something that one IS through being here, breathing, directing oneself within what is best for all, which in the current context of our system, is walking one's process consistently day by day, to eventually stand clearly in every moment - I realize that in moments I may fall as I walk through the layers of energy characters in my mind-physical, however within this context, stability would be the decision to always get back up, and to not dwell on the failure, but to forgive myself and to stand up and continue applying myself and to look at that which cause the fall, to remove that which is not best and then within that to continue walking in this world, supporting myself, others and standing up within the world in order to bring forth an equal money system to create the stability within money that will allow all to walk their process in stable, consistent manner, and to move the world towards the realization of the equality of Life and thus the establishment of ALL the necessary systems to create stable environment for Life to express itself fully at all times without limitation or fear..

Anxiety and Fear as Self Sabotage

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear standing up and speaking up for what is best in this world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being attacked, punished, bullied, shouted at, called names, threatened, physically harmed, or even killed for standing up and speaking up for what is best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the judgement and ridicule of family and friends for speaking up and standing up for what is best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that being attacked for standing up and speaking up for what is best is not a valid excuse to not stand up because I realize that the system must defend itself because it is programmed to survive at all costs, and thus the fear that I feel within is a form of self attack to stop me from standing up and speaking up for what is best and to thus give up, but this in itself is a giving in and a self-manipulation to not change for real, because I realize that the inner change is only real when the outer change is manifest equal and one to the inner change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place value on the opinions of others that are not standing up and speaking up for what is best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be liked by others, and to not realize that wanting to be liked is a program within myself that is only reinforcing my original starting point of fearing the loss of my choice to pursue happiness and energy experience for myself regardless of the cost to myself as my physical body and this physical existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program my body to produce a feeling of anxiety when someone argues against what I stand for, and that I have not stopped this program, but accepted and allowed it to be natural, not realizing that it is a way in which I have programmed myself to stop myself from challenging the energy-authority within myself that if I were to continue accepting as authority will lead to my eventual end and will keep this world locked into a pattern of abuse and fear as I never would have stood up and adjusted the external system, because to do so, will require that I face criticism, argument, and attack from many levels.

I commit myself to investigating through writing, self-forgiveness, and self-corrective application the ways in which I have programmed my body to respond to anything that would challenge the energy-authority within and/or money authority without by producing feelings of fear and anxiety.

I commit myself to speak up and stand up, despite any and all feelings of fear and anxiety, and I realize that it will be a process to stop all these feelings, and within that I will continue to speak and to stand, and not any more accept and allow a feeling to stop me from doing what is best.

Battle of Wits

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see conversation as a battle between opinions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that opinions can never result in an agreement about what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that that best way to assist and support another through communication is to place myself in their shoes, to see the world and life as they are seeing it, and to look at the points where, within that, I am allowing self-dishonesty and to thus forgive myself as that other person and to support them to walk through the self-dishonesty through self-forgiveness until they are clear as to how they have constructed their opinion and belief in a way that is not best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted allowed myself to react to another person's opinion or belief, when in fact this show me, in self-honesty, that I am holding onto an opinion or belief and thus I realize within this that I am in fact grateful when I feel challenged or reactive when presented with a belief or opinion it allows me so see my own self-dishonesty so that I may correct it.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that every person I meet is a mirror for me to see my self-judgment and any reactions that come up within me towards another person have nothing to do with the other person, per se, it has everything to do with me in terms of the value I have placed on certain words, expressions, ways of dressing, ways of acting, etc all based on how I have defined myself in terms of being able to survive in this world through competition for rewards as positive energy and money.

I commit myself to using communication as a way not to win an award but rather as a way to understand myself through my own reactions towards another person and to thus see each person as a mirror so that I may support myself and the other person eventually to self honesty through self forgiveness and within this I stop the conflict for the generation of personal self interest and walk transform communication into something that is used to bring about equality as Life as what is best for all.

Friction as Energy

The friction we generate within, puts us in opposition with everything and everyone without. What we do within our minds is to create conditions that generate energy as feeling with those outside of us and within this, it creates a friction not only within, which we experience as energy and feeling, but also with each other which is manifested as conflicts. When we love another in a special way, we place all others in opposition to that love. When we want to protect another as special, we place all others in a point of attack from our perspective and thus generate and ripple out conflict into the world which eventually comes to a head. This rippling accumulates and builds and eventually erupts within our personal lives as interpersonal conflict and in the bigger picture as war.

See this video to see how small ripples, as opposing forces, eventually creates an extreme form explosion as the opposing ripples build and build: FloWave movie concentric wave spike

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I am the source of all conflict, as I have accepted and allowed a system of conflict within me as I search for experience as feelings and as energy.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize the obvious fact that it is not possible to generate positive energy without generating negative energy as well, when I am only considering 'my self' within the perspective of who the energy is generated for, because this puts me in opposition to everything that is 'not me' as I have defined me and not me within my mind.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that the statement that the negative energy that others experience that was generated by my creation of positive energy is not my responsibility because 'you attract the energy based on what you are focusing on' is in fact a justification for me to abuse others as only existing for me to experience energy, especially considering that in order for me to exist in my body to experience energy, I have to support my body with necessities that I am only able to obtain with money. And the money system that provides these clothes is in fact only a control mechanism to make sure that there are slaves to produce the necessities that I require and that those who have to do the 'dirty work' of creating the necessities for me are in that position because they were not born into the same point in the system that I was, and that this was by chance, and that I did nothing to deserve the position I am in, and in fact have only shown that I in fact DO NOT deserve the position I am in, because I have allowed myself to only focus on ME ME ME getting what I need and want, and not care at all about those who have to work to survive to produce what I need and want, and that there are BILLIONS of humans in that position and thus I have directly enslaved BILLIONS of others, and yet I will ignore the problem as long as I get to experience positive energy, because that is all I care about, me and my experience.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that this existence of me in a position of benefit from the system while many others receive little to no benefit, is only temporary and can only be temporary and that I will eventually end up on the losing end of this game, and that this is in fact me receiving as I have given.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define me as special, superior, amazing, or a good person because I am able to have money flow to me or to have things that I want and need flow to me, using the self deceptive belief that this has something to do with WHO I AM when in common sense fact is has everything to do with WHERE I AM IN THE SYSTEM which is based on my education, what country I was born into, etc., all accidents of my birth, not a result of me being in any way special as a being.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that others have what they have because they have attracted it, when I also believe that we use our minds to attract what we want, and yet I could not have attracted the circumstances of my birth, because when I came into this body, as a baby, I had no mind and this can be verified clearly with scientific means and I know this with common sense because if I saw a baby with no clothes or food left by itself I would not pass it by telling myself that the baby has attracted this situation to itself. And yet, I allow myself to not investigate the living conditions of a majority of humans on this planet where they are like the baby, unable to create a living condition of having everything they need and want as I am because they are in a position in the system where they are in the receiving in of the conflict and lack of care, of the opposing forces that I am pariticpating within everytime I participate in energy or use money or simply sit idly by while doing nothing to stand up and say that the current state of how we live as HUMANS is UNACCEPTABLE. And I will justify this with many ideas and beliefs about God, being afraid, not being capable, but in fact I do not want to give up my position in the system, because I believe that if I challenge the system, I will lose, which proves that I do not really believe my statements that everyone is attracting what they have by virtue of what they are focusing on, because if I stand up for all Life, which would be the highest, most noble act possible, I am afraid that I will lose the support of the system, which further proves that the system does not support Life.

I commit myself to stand up and challenge the system that I have accepted and allowed and created within myself and without to automatically put me in opposition with everything outside of me as I have defined me in my mind to generate conflict to generate energy whether for my own person experience or to support the continuation of a system based on energy generated from conflict.

I commit myself to question every feeling, thought, and belief that I have within me and that I see without and to deconstruct them through writing, self forgiveness, and living corrective application so that I may leave no stone unturned and know that I have done everything possible within what I have accepted and allowed to stop the creation and maintenance of a system and way of existing that does not honor Life as all as one as equal.